Election Day: When things look bad for your side.


Wake up and make yourself a great cup of coffee.  Don’t read any stories on the election.  Don’t turn on the radio.  If you voted, fine you are done.  If you volunteered to get the vote out, good for you and get going.  If you voted absentee, if you did not mail it days ago, you have to hand deliver, it’s not postmarked by November 2 like taxes, it has to be delivered by poll closing time to the Registrar.

Superstition and Glimmers of Hope

Now, start with interpreting omens:  The Giants won the World Series, a rag-tag band of misfits.  You can take that two ways, that all the pundits were wrong, or that the rag-tag Tea Partiers will win.  No, I will take they beat the George Bush team and all the “baseball experts were wrong”.  So, I keep some glimmer of hope.

The Giants win also means good times for California, so I think that Fiorina, Whitman, Maldonado and all other Republicans will lose.

Passive diversion:

Start watching HGTV, Bridezillas and Real Housewife episodes back to back.  Or, if you are more cultured watch Golden Girls and Andy Griffith episodes all day and past the time of the election results.  For the really, really cultured ones, start watching the Wire, or some other elitist series you were meaning to watch.  This technique works really well, it’s mind numbing, you lose connection with the space-time continuum and you actually did not hurt yourself or anyone else.

If you are a high achieving, super-duper organized person, I recommend this tactic.  It will feel like a vacation.

Active Diversion:

Take on at least one thing you meant to do all year:  clean the shower grout and the cracks in the garage; prepare your garden for winter; get started on the taxes; organize all your print pictures; organize your digital pictures;  clean your closet, wash and iron all your bed linens; copy all the addresses and phone numbers to your computer; send thank you notes to people who gave you gifts; go to Amazon and review all the books you read or at the Application store, review the apps you bought; take out you winter clothes and freshen them.

Rules: It has to be something that does not involve shopping and that will make you feel good when it’s done.  So each time you think that the Corporatist Supremacists took over the country, you can say, but heck, I finally did that thing.  I tell you, it takes the edge away.    Just as you start clenching your jaw and your fists, the fact that you ticked off one thing from the list that is never done, will save the day.

I recommend this for slackers, you will feel so good, that it will make you walk on air.  You will have achieved two things, gone counter to your tendencies and actually, done something that even your super achieving friends have not even done.

Tomorrow, this all means war!

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